No Sleep 'til...Who Knows?

The morning Drew was born, I woke up at 3am to use the bathroom (what was new?) and realized I was having contractions upon returning to bed. This had happened previously, so I just tried to sleep, but they got worse...so, I decided to time them. They were all over the place, so I thought nothing of it...but after 2 hrs of this, I was still awake and still contracting. Then, the "big one" happened and my water broke...and well, I haven't had a decent night's sleep since. Actually, I haven't had a decent night's sleep since my 2nd trimester probably.

When I was pregnant, dreaming of my little one, I used to think about how those sleepless nights the first few weeks would be. As the end of my pregnancy drew nearer, and sleep became harder to come by, I began to worry about the lack of sleep. But, I keep telling myself, "it's only for three months, max, then this baby should be sleeping through the night..." I laugh at the "old me" now. How naive I was. As Drew grew, it became evident that, while he slept fine at 3 months old, it wasn't the sleep I had been dreaming of. So, I thought, by 6 months surely he'll be sleeping 10-12 hrs/night, every night. And he can, and does sometimes, sleep 10-11 hrs/night...but he wakes throughout the night and can't soothe himself back to sleep. Now, every two weeks or so, we get a couple of nights here and there where he puts himself back to sleep without our help or doesn't wake, but more often than not, he needs us to show him his paci and pat his bottom, or play his lullabies, to fall back to sleep. I don't get it.

Now, when there are two people doing this nightly, it's tiring...but since Bill's out west skiing, it's all me until Tuesday. Last night was horrendous, the night before, not great. And, after trying all we can try with his heart the way it is, Bill and I are at a loss as to what to do. We can't allow him to cry for long, or escalate really, so crying it out doesn't really work. We tried to modify the so-called Ferber Method because we can't do the just plain "let them cry til they fall asleep" belief of Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. This worked for two nights, then Drew learned to just start screaming and there we were. We've sprinkled the crib with pacis, he sleeps on his tummy because his arms are crazy still and we don't want to swaddle them, we play his lullabies. And still, he wakes up. So, if anyone reading this has any suggestions, please let me know...Mommy needs sleep!!! And so does Daddy! Although, he gets 4 nights of solid sleep this weekend, so I don't really feel too bad for him right now. ;)

Until this gets figured out, I just need to repeat my mantra...it won't be like this for long....